Saturday, July 24, 2010

EHSB, Tigers, Heart Family, and an Effort!

Wow it has been just shy of a month since I actually wrote anything on here.  It is not that I have not wanted to, but I have been busy and honestly afraid to face my blog.  I will start with all the happenings and then tell you how I am doing and feeling.....

Well the fourth of July is my favorite holiday and it was a reminder that I do not ever get to share my favorite holiday with Ethin.  However I did have a good weekend.  I was able to go watch fireworks from a boat on Saturday the 3rd and then to Croton with my best friend on the 4th.  Here is a pic from the 4th....
So I have been working I seriously have an awesome job and I work with great people.  With all that being said my free time is a bit more limited than it used to be.  I am very settled into the house now and my room mate even planted a tree in our front yard in memory of Ethin.
Last Saturday we had an event for the non profit organization I started in memory of Ethin.  Yes that's right you read that right we are officially a non-profit organization!!!  Ethin's Heart Still Beats is in full swing!!!  We had a softball tourney here are pics from that

Me up to bat 
And me sliding...OUCH!!!
Overall the day was great and I could not have asked for a better day to remeber Ethin and have fun doing so!!
Sunday I went golfing for the first time ever in my life...Played the front 9 holes and scored a 76....I actually enjoyed it a lot and I can not wait to go again!!  However I do hope my game will improve!
Then this past Monday I went to watch a Tigers game but on the way down made a pit stop at Mott to drop off some checks and see a heart friend that was in the hospital.
Me giving checks to Dr. Russell at U of M Mott Heart Center
Visiting with Brittney Butcher Love this girl!!!  She is out of the hospital BTW
Also thought since I was in Ann Arbor I would go over to the Ronald McDonald HOuse and check out the leaf on the wall that was put in memory of Ethin
I think it turned out nice thank you to all who helped make this possible!
From there it was off to surprise Tommy!!!  Look out Comerica park here we come!!!  Tommy was shocked to see me and I think he was happy to see me as well what do you think?

Yeppers I love this kid!!!  He is post transplant times one year and doing great!
He also has the hook up and got my hat signed again!

 Tommy with Brandon Inge
There was another one of my heart buddies there too!

This is Christian he has HLHS
Also where there are heart kids there are also some of my favorite Heart moms!!! 
Every time the four of us get together we get a pic taken!!!  This is by far my favorite picture we have done!  In the back there is me and Colleen mommy to Tommy and in the front there is Karen mommy to Christian and Sandy mommy to Heart Angel Ethan .  I love these gals!
This game was very long and Tommy and I were pretty cool looking so people snapped pics!!
We totally were rocking out the game!! 
Also some people we knew from the hospital showed up!

This is Bethanie a nurse that took care of Ethin on 5 East and Regina his pharmacist!  So good to see them
Then the Tigers game went into 14 innings so we of course had to Rally cap!!!
I seriously had a great night and can not wait for August when I hope to see some of these same people at the stadium again!!!

So that leads me to reality....I seriously thought and had it stuck in my head that after it had been a year that I would feel a ton better and maybe not so miserable.  I have not wrote, becasue here it is>>>>>>>>>>I still feel like crap a lot of the time.  I mean I am happier and living again, but I still harbor so many of my feelings inside!  I still have guilt and all the things that come with the fact that my son is gone.  I miss him just as much today as I did when it happened.  OK I can not really even elaborate on it right now I am crying and just need a nap.  I encourage you to watch the video in my previous post....
Love to you all Jessica